“There’s no better time than the present.” It is an old adage, but definitely a true one in this case.
If there is someone in your life who you feel should have his or her story preserved, my recommendation is to start the process as soon as possible. Too often I have heard someone lament, “I wish I had recorded my mom’s/dad’s/grandparents’ stories when I had the chance. Now it’s too late.”
One of the easiest, most accessible ways to do that is to conduct oral history interviews—simply record your loved one telling a story. There is no need to ask them to write their life history themselves. Let’s be honest: writing takes a long time and is often an intimidating process. Instead, ask them what you want to know and what you want to preserve and have a conversation. If you simply remember to make an audio recording of that conversation—you can do it on your smartphone—you will take that all important first step toward preserving your loved one’s life history.
I have heard many excuses for why people put off doing a personal history. Certainly, some circumstances may require a delay, but if the obstacle is just one of timing or convenience, I strong urge you to find a way to make it a priority. Find the time. Create the opportunity.
Here’s how I respond to some frequent concerns that I have heard about starting a loved one’s personal history:
It is such a daunting task. How do I start? Start small. Have a conversation over coffee or even a meal. If you are far away geographically, pick up the phone or schedule a video call. You don’t have to do anything formal—just encourage your loved one to share some of their experiences. Maybe start with the stories he or she is known for. Or ask about their childhood. Have your recording device at the ready whenever the opportunity arises.
What if my loved one balks at the idea? Some people are indeed nervous about the prospect of recording their life stories. I often hear, “No one really cares about my stories.” If that’s the case, reassure them that you care. Be patient with the reluctance but explain why it is important to you, your family, your community, and history in general. You might ask some others to encourage your loved one too. But whatever you do, don’t give up! I bet that you will find that they warm up to the idea and start to look forward to these history-gathering conversations.
Is this something I should hire a professional for? Maybe. It depends. If you can devote the time and attention to the project, then do it. However, if you don’t have the sufficient time, hiring a professional personal historian is always an option. A professional can also sometimes break down barriers where a family member or a friend can’t. A good personal historian will also be able to focus interviews and will know how to get those all important details. If you need help—at any point during the process—don’t hesitate to seek out a professional to step in whenever or however you need. For more information on some of the ways a personal historian can help, see how Interwoven Heritage Services can help. https://interwovenheritageservices.com/personal-history-services/
The biggest piece of advice I can give is this: Just do it. Stop making excuses and find a way to get it done. You don’t want to join the “if only” chorus. Don’t be one of those people who laments, “If only I had preserved my loved one’s story while I could.” Stop saying, “Someday, I want to record my loved one’s personal history.” Make “someday” today.
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